Jackie Writes:

I came to this country from Trinidad six years ago with my daughter. My daughter started to get a little wild when she started high school, so I went to the local Church looking for help. One of the men at the Church befriended me and offered to help me with my daughter. At first he would just give me advice and support but gradually we became closer. He began to tell me about the problems he was having with his wife and how he wanted to leave her. One thing lead to another and soon I found myself having sex with him.

Our relationship grew and he kept telling me he was going to be filing for divorce and marrying me. He said we needed to make plans for our future and asked me to lend him money for various "investments". All in all, I gave him over fifteen thousand dollars over the course of two years. It may not seem like much to many people, but it was everything I had saved from my little housecleaning jobs.

Well, the investments never seemed to pay me any returns and our relationship never turned into a marriage. In fact he never even left his wife. I am angry and broke. How can I get past these terrible feelings I have towards this man! The truth is sometimes I still miss him and hope he marries me. I know this sounds crazy but what should I do?

MR. GOODADVICE RESPONDS:

You sound like a good woman. I am saddened to read about your plight. However, you really need to turn the tables on this prick. Do you have evidence to prove your relationship? If you do perhaps you should consider gathering it all together and sending his wife a nice package filled with all of the photographs and love letters this creep gave you to convince you to give him your cash! This could be seen as a form of harassment but this dude deserves it!

You need to stop thinking about this guy coming back to marry you. If he comes back at all it will be to get more of your money! He saw that you were vulnerable and he took advantage of you and if you haven't learned your lesson he will do it again!

He never planned to leave his wife. He never planned to be with you, so stop waiting and dreaming for these things to happen. You were simply a victim to this guy. Someone to use sexually and for his own financial game. Stop being a victim!

We all make mistakes. We all let people into our lives who do not deserve our love and commitment to them. When we discover that they are no good for us we MUST let them go. No matter how cute they are; no matter how great the sex is with them; no matter what intriguing thing they bring to the table when we discover that they are toxic to us we MUST move on. When we don't learn from our mistakes we are just going to continue to make them. I am sure you can't afford to do that at this time in your life.

Be thankful this jerk only took your money. Others have paid a far worse price for having bad people in their life. What you have lost you can recover and because you work hard I know you will do so very soon.